My thoughts on Prop 8…

I could try to write something now but I feel like today’s ruling said so much that it speaks for itself…Page 38 was the best part in my view:

“We are excited to see someone ask, “Will you marry me?”, whether on bended knee in a restaurant or in text splashed across a stadium Jumbotron. Certainly it would not have the same effect to see “Will you enter into a registered domestic partnership with me?”. Groucho Marx’s one-liner, “Marriage is a wonderful institution…but who wants to live in an institution?” would lack its punch if the word ‘marriage’ were replaced with the alternative phrase. So too with Shakespeare’s “A young man married is a man that’s marr’d,” Lincoln’s “Marriage is neither heaven nor hell, it is simply purgatory,” and Sinatra’s “A man doesn’t know what happiness is until he’s married. By then it’s too late.” We see tropes like “marrying for love” versus “marrying for money” played out again and again in our films and literature because of the recognized importance and permanence of the marriage relationship. Had Marilyn Monroe’s film been called How to Register a Domestic Partnership with a Millionaire, it would not have conveyed the same meaning as did her famous movie, even though the underlying drama for same-sex couples is no different. The name ‘marriage’ signifies the unique recognition that society gives to harmonious, loyal, enduring, and intimate relationships.”

Meanwhile within the introduction section (page 5) it summarized the case rather well as it said :

“Proposition 8 serves no purpose, and has no effect, other than to lessen the status and human dignity of gays and lesbians in California, and to officially reclassify their relationships and families as inferior to those of opposite-sex couples. The Constitution simply does not allow for ‘laws of this sort.'”I was considering going out to celebrate – but I’m tired. Not just from sleep deprivation – but the mental exhaustion that arises with every time this case interrupts life. Every time a verdict regarding this has been on the horizon – whether from the voters on November 4th 2008, or before hearing the oral hearing on March 5th 2009, or when we anxiously waited for the first Day of Decision of that ruling, prepared to Meet in the Middle, set our scopes on national equality with the National Equality March in DC, when we fought the repetition of this case in Question 1 in Maine, as it went to Judge Walker, After his ruling when it was first made unconstitutional August 4th 2010, When it went back to court before Judge Ware to decide if the decision should be vacated after the proponents discovered Judge Walker had a long time same-sex partner, then to the California Superior court to advise the 9th circuit on if the state could be represented by the proponents if the state would not appeal, then to the 9th circuit which leads us to today…

On the eve of every one of these moments my insomnia gets worse and I spend an anxiety induced night with no sleep, groggy eyes when I finally get out of bed to shower and get on with the events of the day. (Whether that means driving to SF, working at voter reg or otherwise being active in the cause) Today was no different. I’m tired of these nights. The flashbacks of stresses and new stresses. The media narrative that makes me want to pull my hair out or slap an announcer for trying to be neutral and in doing so dehumanizing the people behind it. As such – I don’t greet today’s victory with a cheer, I greet it with a sigh. One more step on this fight…

And hopefully tomorrow’s headline will be the same – albeit with an updated image…

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